Meaning that Turtle is on her way to the hospital to get checked. We may have a new baby on the way.
She called me at 3:30am - proving that when you can't call anyone else, you can call Mama.
"I've already called the doctor and he told me to go to hospital [note: it's 45minutes away from her house] but I wanted to know what you think I should do."
Her water was "leaking" but she was not having contractions. Water hadn't actually broken - just leaking. We discussed her condition, her memories of the birth of Duchess, my memories of her own birth.
With a smile in my voice, I told her, "Don't leave it too long - you were born less than two hours after we called the doctor, and you know, I've told you he didn't make it."
"Mama, don't tell me that!" she exclaims in (maybe mock) horror.
In the end, she decided to listen to her body and wait until contractions started. The baby was not due to be here until February 9th. But that's another thing with babies - sometimes they have their own schedule.
Now here it is, 7:30am. She called an hour ago to say that contractions had started, slow contractions, possibly first stage of labor. Timed 45 minutes apart. She called for babysitter advice - can't take the Duchess, of course she could, but if today isn't The Day, there would be disruption and confusion for no reason. I can't - Pooh Bear still sleeping and her schedule is pretty much king around here. So they were going to call WowGuy's mom to come stay with Duchess. If today is The Day, then she can bring the Duchess here and stay with Pooh and Dilly, who should be here by the time we know whether it's really time or not. Or if this is a false alarm.
And now - Birth of Turtle:
Dancer was nearly two. Pretty much a Duchess in her own right, oldest grandchild on both paternal and maternal side. On daddy's side, there had since been another baby, but she was rarely there the same time Dancer was at MawMaw's, so she still pretty much ruled.
Two months before Turtle's due date, a drunk driver had pulled on the highway right in front of me, night before Thanksgiving, roads crazy, I'm trying to get home. I could not avoid him. Seatbelts saved our lives, drunkenness apparently saved his. Long story short, Dancer was traumatized, I was bruised mightily on pregnant belly and legs, car was totalled.
Subsequent checkups showed baby was fine, I was fine. But. I stopped gaining weight. Baby stopped gaining weight. Which, let's be honest ME not gaining weight was not a bad thing to me - baby not gaining weight was a little troublesome.
Time marches on, and due date was approaching - January 16th? maybe? was the due date. It passed, doctor started getting a little bit worried, but tests showed nothing out of whack.
12:30am January 18, 1980. I wake up gasping for breath. Unmistakable contraction. I don't wake hubby up, but choose to watch the contractions. For the next three contractions, they are about 30 minutes apart, lasting about 1 1/2 - 2 minutes. Breathe. May not be it. Long pause - no fourth contraction. Start drifting back to sleep when - BAM! - hard contraction. Next two are every 15 minutes. Wake hubby. We start timing together. He's concerned, goes to call the doctor, I call my mom who comes to stay with Dancer.
2:30am January 18, 1980. On the road to hospital. Contractions have stepped up, harder and longer. Hubs is making an effort to concentrate on driving. Fortunately, the roads are nearly empty.
3:00am January 18, 1980. We get to the hospital safely, nurses do their examination quickly, glance at each other and ask, Have you called the doctor? Yes, we say. With a (maybe panicked?) glance one nurse leaves to go call him again.
By this time, contractions are coming in earnest, moving quickly from 5 minutes apart to 2 1/2 minutes apart. They've moved me already to a delivery table (back in the day, they still had a separate delivery room). Hubby had not been through the hospital "Daddy Training" so he was banished to the hall, to watch from the daddy window.
3:30am January 18,1980. Two nurses now, trying to be encouraging, but I still hear the sort-of panic in their voices.
Breathe, they say.
Here have some nitrous oxide, they say.
DON'T PUSH, they say.
The doctor is on his way, they say.
PLEASE, they say.
4:10am January 18, 1980. My body and my baby have other plans. Pushing almost against my will, Turtle is caught by two nurses who had had no plans to deliver a baby tonight. As they lay her across my now nearly empty abdomen (doesn't that word look like it needs to be "abdoman"? If it's just one?) and she looks at me with huge eyes, fist - no, maybe it was already her thumb - in her mouth studying me quietly, for just a moment.
The doctor runs in delivery, hair dripping wet still from an apparently hurried shower (to wake up? because he thought he had all the time in the world?), just in time to finish with cutting the cord, repairing a little tear from the birth, delivery the yucky stuff. They whisk Turtle away.
It turns out that, yes, she had stopped growing about six weeks ago. The placenta was scarred from the accident. Everything had matured normally, but her birth weight was less than six pounds: 5 lbs, 12 oz. Not only was her weight a bit under normal, but she was tiny all over. Like I said, completely normal (they watched her like a hawk for two years), but tiny. Her head was small, but not microcephalic, her shoulders were small, her hips were small. She had to wear preemie diapers and clothes for about a month.
And now this tiny baby girl is on her way - possibly - to have a (second) daughter of her own.
The wheel keeps turning.
Thursday, January 20, 2011
Thursday, January 6, 2011
Sick Day - and Gratuitous Baby Cuteness
Well. I guess the flu got me anyway.
By the time I went to bed two days ago, I was running a pretty good temp. I went ahead and emailed work - not coming in.
Crashed - kinda in and out all night - kept getting up and checking temp and taking ibuprofen all night.
Morning. Drag myself through getting Pooh Bear out of bed. One of those days when I wish there was someone else. But there isn't. Crash on the couch where she can see me if she needs me.
HOURS later I stumble around and get her lunch. Managed to get a load of laundry in the washer after mouldering on the floor all day. *ewwww* So. Crash again on the couch.
Suddenly, about 4pm it seems to be over. I'm up. I still have a bit of a runny nose and a HUGE headache. But the worst is suddenly gone.
**************
I got a packet of pictures in the mail of the new baby. A-DOR-A-BLE!! He's in a little elf outfit. Too cute!
There were a bunch more. But this is Oots. Maybe one day his nickname will make more sense.
By the time I went to bed two days ago, I was running a pretty good temp. I went ahead and emailed work - not coming in.
Crashed - kinda in and out all night - kept getting up and checking temp and taking ibuprofen all night.
Morning. Drag myself through getting Pooh Bear out of bed. One of those days when I wish there was someone else. But there isn't. Crash on the couch where she can see me if she needs me.
HOURS later I stumble around and get her lunch. Managed to get a load of laundry in the washer after mouldering on the floor all day. *ewwww* So. Crash again on the couch.
Suddenly, about 4pm it seems to be over. I'm up. I still have a bit of a runny nose and a HUGE headache. But the worst is suddenly gone.
**************
There were a bunch more. But this is Oots. Maybe one day his nickname will make more sense.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
The bane of winter
All Baby Boy's babies have the flu. I woke up about 4am burning up and stuffy. So. Either the flu or a cold. Doesn't matter. I'm currently miserable.
Papaw left sometime during the night to have a "minor" outpatient spinal surgery. They would not do it unless he had a driver. I'm glad it wasn't me. Driving that is. Or having "minor" surgery. Or going to B'ham.
Ok, I did have a story, but you know what? Feeling crappy enough that I am not in the mood to tell.
Let this be an effort towards writing daily. Good luck with that. Crap had to spell "that" three times. Best to let it goooooo.
Papaw left sometime during the night to have a "minor" outpatient spinal surgery. They would not do it unless he had a driver. I'm glad it wasn't me. Driving that is. Or having "minor" surgery. Or going to B'ham.
Ok, I did have a story, but you know what? Feeling crappy enough that I am not in the mood to tell.
Let this be an effort towards writing daily. Good luck with that. Crap had to spell "that" three times. Best to let it goooooo.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Undermining Parental Authority - Lovey's Sacred Duty
"Mom. You are undermining my parental authority."
This is a phrase so oft repeated by my son that I no longer feel the need to respond. The daughters and Dilly (Daughter in law - DIL get it?) don't even bother. They have all learned the "mom" look, the one that - when the child in question looks from mom to Lovey - the look that clearly says, "You will continue on this path at risk of grave bodily harm to your person." Kids KNOW that look. They respect it.
They love to go up and down the stairs. I'm all for it. Sort of. I think they need the practice. Also, I DON'T want to go up and down the stairs, so I can send them up there to fetch and retrieve things. Mostly. Sometimes they forget to bring me what I sent them for.
The parents - MY KIDS - do NOT like to let them go up and down the stairs. They are terrified. As a matter of fact, my son and his wife moved out of a two-story townhouse because they were afraid Lulu would fall. I keep telling them that it would take only one time and they would learn to be careful. Probably.
Doodle had - maybe she still has, I just haven't seen it recently - a really bad habit of climbing the chairs to the kitchen table and running from one end to the other. That was mostly this summer. She was maybe 15 months old when she started, about the time she learned how to climb. She was/is QUICK, scary quick, as well. She could be in the living room, you walk to the kitchen to get a glass of water, turn and she's running on the table. Less than 5 seconds.
One time I was babysitting Doodle when Turtle and Duchess came for a visit. Doodle was maybe 18 months, Duchess was three and a half. Thinking that with Turtle there, there was little risk of Doodle doing her table dancing act, I turned my back for just a second. Next thing I know, Doodle is doing laps on the table. (I think she must like it because it's big enough to seat ten - takes up the whole dining room. And I keep it bare - mostly because she is able to climb.)
Turtle and I both rushed to grab her, Doodle thinks we're playing KeepAway. After we've got her contained - again - and move all the chairs out of range (not that that will stop her, but it's a hurdle), Duchess remarks, clearly holding back a giggle, "That's very, very dangerous!" then ruins it by bursting into laughter.
Duchess, you are undermining Lovey's authority as well.
This is a phrase so oft repeated by my son that I no longer feel the need to respond. The daughters and Dilly (Daughter in law - DIL get it?) don't even bother. They have all learned the "mom" look, the one that - when the child in question looks from mom to Lovey - the look that clearly says, "You will continue on this path at risk of grave bodily harm to your person." Kids KNOW that look. They respect it.
They love to go up and down the stairs. I'm all for it. Sort of. I think they need the practice. Also, I DON'T want to go up and down the stairs, so I can send them up there to fetch and retrieve things. Mostly. Sometimes they forget to bring me what I sent them for.
The parents - MY KIDS - do NOT like to let them go up and down the stairs. They are terrified. As a matter of fact, my son and his wife moved out of a two-story townhouse because they were afraid Lulu would fall. I keep telling them that it would take only one time and they would learn to be careful. Probably.
Doodle had - maybe she still has, I just haven't seen it recently - a really bad habit of climbing the chairs to the kitchen table and running from one end to the other. That was mostly this summer. She was maybe 15 months old when she started, about the time she learned how to climb. She was/is QUICK, scary quick, as well. She could be in the living room, you walk to the kitchen to get a glass of water, turn and she's running on the table. Less than 5 seconds.
One time I was babysitting Doodle when Turtle and Duchess came for a visit. Doodle was maybe 18 months, Duchess was three and a half. Thinking that with Turtle there, there was little risk of Doodle doing her table dancing act, I turned my back for just a second. Next thing I know, Doodle is doing laps on the table. (I think she must like it because it's big enough to seat ten - takes up the whole dining room. And I keep it bare - mostly because she is able to climb.)
Turtle and I both rushed to grab her, Doodle thinks we're playing KeepAway. After we've got her contained - again - and move all the chairs out of range (not that that will stop her, but it's a hurdle), Duchess remarks, clearly holding back a giggle, "That's very, very dangerous!" then ruins it by bursting into laughter.
Duchess, you are undermining Lovey's authority as well.
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Aaaaand we're back at work..
Now I get it. Hard to find ANYthing positive to write about, much less have the time, when I'm back at work. I think of a thousand things a day to write about but by the time I get home and have a moment, I've lost interest. I guess that's why some people update their blogs on their cell phones and whatnot.
Happy New Year to all! Yesterday was the first time in years I totally broke with all my New Year's traditions. No resolutions. Didn't create or eat the annual "good luck" meal. Yeah, I'm probably going to burn for that one. I did laundry - my husband would not let me do laundry on New Year's Day, some kind of bad luck thing, I don't know what for sure. Maybe it was just a tradition born of his mother or grandmother wanting to have a day off, way back when. Whatever the case, laundry needed to be done so I did it.
Turtle and the Duchess came for a visit. Really very nice. Duchess kept telling me, "We will have a party and I am almost four years old!" and "Lovey, you are my best friend!" Really, can a New Year start better than that?
Turtle told me a little heartwarmer that happened on the way to Lovey's house. Duchess had been chattering about parties and Christmas and fun at Lovey's house. When she grew quiet, Turtle got a little alarmed (Duchess has a tendency to get carsick) and asked, "Sweetie, are you okay?"
Duchess turned to her with a look of serenity and contentment and said on a sigh, "I'm just so happy.."
Rare moment.
And now for the bad news: I'm on call for the weekend. The co-worker who was SUPPOSED to be on-call for the weekend had some phone issues (Turtle was calling BULL! but *sigh* what could I do?) so I agreed to take it for him. The calls have not been that bad but people, PEOPLE, sometimes I hate dealing with people - unreasonable, snarly, snide.
For example, I had two calls yesterday, back-to-back, with nearly the same issue. Phone line problems, or could be a bad phone. I am only required to dispatch a field tech if the phone doesn't work at all, but in both cases it was an issue with house wiring, and the phone was working if it was directly connected.
CALL ONE:
Me: Connect the phone directly to the device. Do you have dial tone?
Nice Customer: Yes, it's working now.
Me: If you would like for us to come out and check your house wiring, please call the office Monday morning and schedule an appointment.
Nice Customer: Thank you! We'll do that. At least we have a working phone!
CALL TWO:
Me: Connect the phone directly to the device. Do you have dial tone?
Bitchy Customer: No.
Me: (Looking at the diagnostics, I can tell she hasn't made any changes) You need to disconnect the line on the device and connect a phone directly to it.
BC: I can't do that, you need to send someone.
Me: (I know she CAN disconnect the line, we had already been through that step) If I send a tech on a holiday, you will be charged. I'm just trying to help you avoid any additional charges.
BC: There better not be any charges on my account! This phone been like this since I got it!
Me: (Checking records, I see that she has had the service for over three years and this is the first time there is a record of a bad phone line call) *SIGH* I understand, but I do have to warn you. I am not responsible for charges but accounting will put charges on your account if they see that I've sent a tech out there. Now, please connect a phone directly to the device and let's check for dial tone.
BC: But then I won't have a phone in my livin' room!
The fact that you have a cheap crap cordless phone that is messing up the internal lines is NOT an emergency. Just saying.
Also, the fact that a customer has TIME on a holiday that he normally doesn't, does NOT mean I want to hang out and chat. If I ask, what can I do to help you? Do not ask if I'm having a happy new year. Duh! I'm WORKING what do you think? I'm also not going to take an extended amount of time to help you set up the XBox/Playstation/IPad you got for Christmas. Not when you've had an entire week to call during business hours and didn't.
One last thing: If you call me on Saturday night at 9pm and open with, "It's been doing this for a couple of weeks now...." Guess what? It's probably going to have to suffer until Monday. Really? Couple of weeks? And you don't want to troubleshoot, you want me to send someone on a rainy Saturday night JUST BECAUSE you just now have time to deal with it? I think not.
I hate being on call.
Happy New Year to all! Yesterday was the first time in years I totally broke with all my New Year's traditions. No resolutions. Didn't create or eat the annual "good luck" meal. Yeah, I'm probably going to burn for that one. I did laundry - my husband would not let me do laundry on New Year's Day, some kind of bad luck thing, I don't know what for sure. Maybe it was just a tradition born of his mother or grandmother wanting to have a day off, way back when. Whatever the case, laundry needed to be done so I did it.
*********************************
Turtle and the Duchess came for a visit. Really very nice. Duchess kept telling me, "We will have a party and I am almost four years old!" and "Lovey, you are my best friend!" Really, can a New Year start better than that?
Turtle told me a little heartwarmer that happened on the way to Lovey's house. Duchess had been chattering about parties and Christmas and fun at Lovey's house. When she grew quiet, Turtle got a little alarmed (Duchess has a tendency to get carsick) and asked, "Sweetie, are you okay?"
Duchess turned to her with a look of serenity and contentment and said on a sigh, "I'm just so happy.."
Rare moment.
***********************
And now for the bad news: I'm on call for the weekend. The co-worker who was SUPPOSED to be on-call for the weekend had some phone issues (Turtle was calling BULL! but *sigh* what could I do?) so I agreed to take it for him. The calls have not been that bad but people, PEOPLE, sometimes I hate dealing with people - unreasonable, snarly, snide.
For example, I had two calls yesterday, back-to-back, with nearly the same issue. Phone line problems, or could be a bad phone. I am only required to dispatch a field tech if the phone doesn't work at all, but in both cases it was an issue with house wiring, and the phone was working if it was directly connected.
CALL ONE:
Me: Connect the phone directly to the device. Do you have dial tone?
Nice Customer: Yes, it's working now.
Me: If you would like for us to come out and check your house wiring, please call the office Monday morning and schedule an appointment.
Nice Customer: Thank you! We'll do that. At least we have a working phone!
CALL TWO:
Me: Connect the phone directly to the device. Do you have dial tone?
Bitchy Customer: No.
Me: (Looking at the diagnostics, I can tell she hasn't made any changes) You need to disconnect the line on the device and connect a phone directly to it.
BC: I can't do that, you need to send someone.
Me: (I know she CAN disconnect the line, we had already been through that step) If I send a tech on a holiday, you will be charged. I'm just trying to help you avoid any additional charges.
BC: There better not be any charges on my account! This phone been like this since I got it!
Me: (Checking records, I see that she has had the service for over three years and this is the first time there is a record of a bad phone line call) *SIGH* I understand, but I do have to warn you. I am not responsible for charges but accounting will put charges on your account if they see that I've sent a tech out there. Now, please connect a phone directly to the device and let's check for dial tone.
BC: But then I won't have a phone in my livin' room!
The fact that you have a cheap crap cordless phone that is messing up the internal lines is NOT an emergency. Just saying.
Also, the fact that a customer has TIME on a holiday that he normally doesn't, does NOT mean I want to hang out and chat. If I ask, what can I do to help you? Do not ask if I'm having a happy new year. Duh! I'm WORKING what do you think? I'm also not going to take an extended amount of time to help you set up the XBox/Playstation/IPad you got for Christmas. Not when you've had an entire week to call during business hours and didn't.
One last thing: If you call me on Saturday night at 9pm and open with, "It's been doing this for a couple of weeks now...." Guess what? It's probably going to have to suffer until Monday. Really? Couple of weeks? And you don't want to troubleshoot, you want me to send someone on a rainy Saturday night JUST BECAUSE you just now have time to deal with it? I think not.
I hate being on call.
Sunday, December 26, 2010
Kid Quotes
Kids say the darnedest things.
After the Dancer's baby "Oots" was born, her husband's nephews were observing him through the nursery window. We were all anxiously awaiting a visit with Dancer and her hubby - and maybe even holding the baby!
Youngest nephew, age 2, looked at the tiny red-and-white striped stocking cap on the baby, put there of course to keep him warm, and quipped, "He looks like a EFF (elf)!" Santa on the brain, kid.
A little while later, after looking at the nativity scene someone had set up at the nurses station - still waiting to see the new family - the same nephew was being held by his grandmother, again, at the nursery window. He patted her face with his chubby little hands and said, "He's not Baby Jesus?" Grandmother didn't even try to hold her laughter as she assured him that, No, he was not Baby Jesus.
After the Dancer's baby "Oots" was born, her husband's nephews were observing him through the nursery window. We were all anxiously awaiting a visit with Dancer and her hubby - and maybe even holding the baby!
Youngest nephew, age 2, looked at the tiny red-and-white striped stocking cap on the baby, put there of course to keep him warm, and quipped, "He looks like a EFF (elf)!" Santa on the brain, kid.
A little while later, after looking at the nativity scene someone had set up at the nurses station - still waiting to see the new family - the same nephew was being held by his grandmother, again, at the nursery window. He patted her face with his chubby little hands and said, "He's not Baby Jesus?" Grandmother didn't even try to hold her laughter as she assured him that, No, he was not Baby Jesus.
***********************
Now for a little history:
A year ago, the Duchess was age two going on 15 - drama queen. She had been scolded SO MANY TIMES about touching the Christmas presents, that when it finally became time to open them, she reportedly stood in her bedroom door and cried in despair, "I can NEVER open presents!" and then ran to her room weeping. She eventually got over it.
***********************
One more history: Just after Lulu's 7th birthday, she and Boogah (4) were going to ride with Lovey (me) to the store, and 3-month-old Doodle would ride with mom and dad. Mom and dad's relief that I was taking the two older kids was so strong that Lulu commented on it.
"Three must be a lot harder than two," she said, raising that one eyebrow in the way she does. (She won't teach me how to do that).
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Sometimes nobody else will do
Attention all mothers-in-law:
"There's nobody like your mama, but I.... (fill in the blank)" is not an acceptable phrase. Especially when "mama" is sitting RIGHT THERE.
There's no "but" after that phrase. Just accept it. Sometimes your daughter-in-law wants her mama. Period the end.
I can't be close enough right now to fulfill all the wishes and needs my daughter has. But that does not mean she needs or wants anyone else to do so either. It's a mama thing. A little empathy please?
My mother had no problem speaking those thoughts out loud - and nobody loved her for it. I guess that's what I'm trying to avoid.
"There's nobody like your mama, but I.... (fill in the blank)" is not an acceptable phrase. Especially when "mama" is sitting RIGHT THERE.
There's no "but" after that phrase. Just accept it. Sometimes your daughter-in-law wants her mama. Period the end.
I can't be close enough right now to fulfill all the wishes and needs my daughter has. But that does not mean she needs or wants anyone else to do so either. It's a mama thing. A little empathy please?
*************************
Daughter the second, Turtle, keeps after me to write. She says I'm funny. I have trouble being funny here apparently. It's been one complaint after another. This has come to be the place where I can vent all those unspeakable thoughts that I can't say out loud. My mother had no problem speaking those thoughts out loud - and nobody loved her for it. I guess that's what I'm trying to avoid.
*************************
Sobfest yesterday afternoon. For the record, NOT the reason I'm going home. You know how it is, one person gets started crying and then it's contagious. Man, I may cry again thinking about it.
Dancer was venting herself a little. New mama, you know there are frustrations. And she's trying to figure it out, I'm trying to give her room, but she feels crowded. She told me that it's not me that's crowding her (I don't know whether it's a lie or not). My key point was this:
"Now you know. Now you know how you feel about that little man in there, right?" She nodded. "THAT'S how I feel about you, when you were born, then, now and always. I love you and want to do what's best for you."
"Now you know. Now you know how you feel about that little man in there, right?" She nodded. "THAT'S how I feel about you, when you were born, then, now and always. I love you and want to do what's best for you."
There was more, but I wanted her to know that although I was here to meet the baby, and hold him, and maybe introduce him to my voice, my main objective was to take care of her. My job.
She has a husband, though, that is doing wonderfully. He's pretty amazing to her. So I feel right leaving now. I want to be here but to stay longer would be to indulge myself.
Maybe next time I'll have a funny story. Time to get back to the other kids and grandkids.
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